Senioritis or Stress? (Blog 15)

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Normally, I wouldn't complain about my studies but for the beginning of the 4th quarter of my senior year, I have been under unusual amount of stress. I have only three AP Courses (Psychology, Literature, European-History), but they are making me go insane. Although, I will practically have nothing to do in these classes after the AP exams, they are cramming the work for the whole quarter in approximately two weeks. On top of all that, I have H-Precalculus. Math, only the sound of it can make me run a 100 miles away. I hate Math, for all of the people who love math and actually understands math, lucky for you. I have nothing against technology or sciences but I am never going to be a scientist or God forbids a math teacher. Maybe, the reason why I hate it so much is because I haven't been exposed to it for a long period of time like most of the students at the school. But anyhow, I don't understand the need to know trigonometric equations or anything out of the ordinary. Ask anyone that is working and not a math person, they will never remember the stuff they learned in their trigonometry class but they might still be successful in life. Here is the thing; Math explores some real life problems, but the problems they explore are mostly out of the ordinary. No one in mind is going to wonder how high the bird is from the ground when it's on a tree. If a bird is on a tree, it's on a tree; it's a very simple logic. But for some bizarre reasons you wonder how high the bird is from the ground then trig functions and such will be very useful to you. I believe in simple and very basic math such as adding, subtracting, multiplying, and dividing. I believe in those because I use it in my everyday life, such as spending and making money. Money is a luxury that we all work to have, because without it, we will never be able to live. So I ask myself, why did I take this unnecessary math class in my senior year? And I now know the answer. Some colleges that I was applying to recommended that I take pre-calculus in high school. But now, I have committed to Wheaton College and I don't want to have to worry about that class but I am scared and afraid that if I fail that class, the college will have to review my case and in some extreme situations, can rescind their offer. So this time of a high school senior that is in a situation like me, is no time for senioritis but only stress.

The Reasons Why I Am Alive (Blog#14)

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There are only a few reasons why I am alive. One, I am alive so I can be a messenger, a witness to the cold and cruel world. Two, I am alive to help others using my specific skill set. Three, I live to protect the ones that I love. And four, I live to achieve what I want out of life. Life's pleasures along the way are just the bonuses I earned. Ask anyone you know, and ask them how long they can live without their cell phones or iPods. The answer will probably be not even a minute. In the developed countries, most of the people have not realized the harsh truth and think that the technological inventions are part of their lives and they won't be wrong but nature has a way of ripping a soul away from body no matter what technological inventions can do. There's no one way to simplify the matter of harshness and the cruelty of the other half of the world. Most people in this part of the world, fortunately, did not have to go through the harsh reality of starvation, execution, ethnic cleansing, and doing the most extreme things to survive. I, personally do not expect everybody to understand what goes on around the world but at least I desire people to understand that this is not the whole world, and be mindful of the things happening in the other countries because we live in the same world. If we are not mindful or aware of half the things that goes on around the world, our general intelligence will dramatically decline. Some people think that they know everything, walking around the hallways trying to preach to people what they think you need to and what is expected of you. I generally do not agree with anything they say because all they know is Lowell. They were born in Lowell, they went to schools in Lowell, and they work in Lowell. Therefore all they know is Lowell and everything that they say is all influenced by Lowell. Please don't get me wrong, I am not saying that I know everything, and I definitely do not have any problems with people telling me about what I need to do and such but there's always a limit for everything. Once they step out the limit, I break down. And of course I have to be quite because I live in a bureaucracy. The bottom line here is none of us know everything, and we are going to disagree on matters and that is perfectly normal but sometimes we have to be respectful of each other’s opinions. I live to tell the tales that some never got the chance to and these are the reasons why I am alive.

Colleges (Blog #13)

           My first college admission decision was a rejection; it absolutely drained my enthusiasm and motivation. The next one was also a rejection and also the next one. I got rejected from Brandeis, Northeastern, and Boston University. The only reason why I got rejected was because of my SAT's, my SAT's were not good enough. But considering the fact that I have only been in school for five years, the SAT's were not a fair game for me. But after those two rejections, I got accepted to Wheaton College, Norton MA and Providence College in Rhode Island, I think the reason why I got accepted was because they didn't require the SAT's. I literally hate standardized testing, it's very unethical. But now I have two more schools to hear from, College of the Holy Cross and UMass Amherst. I am still nervous about them because I have done everything in my power to get to where I am, and now it's the time for me to pray and hope that good things will happen to me. It's a very scary feeling, where you hope that you get in, but there is no assurance that it will happen. I am scared of opening letters from colleges and finding out the decision. Five years ago, when I arrived in the states, I thought I will be lucky if I just graduate from high school because I thought that I will never be good enough. The reason why I thought that was because I have never been in a formal school, never had no education, never had no money. I grew up in places where people treated me like dirt and telling me that I am nothing but a loser, and the fact that I am never going to be good enough. I believed them for a while, I believed them because I hear them say the same thing over and over again. But when I started learning in the states, I realized that with that kind of mentality, I will never be able to get anywhere and succeed in life. I started to realize a lot of things, such as there is more to life than just fighting with your fists and etc. I tried really hard in school, I tried really hard so that I can prove to those people who said I am not good enough. I am very persistent in many ways, I don't give up too easily and I am going to a college in the fall!! I can not be happier than to be accepted to one of the best liberal arts colleges in the country. But we shall see, there are no limit to what the future holds for me and for you.

Fire Alram.. (Blog#12)

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          This past weekend, the fire alarm went off in my neighbors' house. That house is occupied by mostly Burmese refugees and it was the first time they experienced a fire alarm in their houses.  Of course the kids have experienced the evacuation in their schools but for most of the adults panicked. Fortunately, I was there at the time talking to a family that just arrived last week about the 'Nemo Blizzard', I had to check on them because it was the first time they experienced a snow storm. I had to make sure they were warm and that they had enough food. When the fire department arrived at the house, they started asking questions to the resident and I had to take leadership and try to explain the situation to the firemen. Some of infants were crying because of the loud noise from the alarm and it was painful. I did my best trying to evacuate people from all the different apartments and I was successful. It was something really new for them, and I am glad that I was able to help them get through the first time they heard the fire alarm and hopefully the next time it happens, they will know what to do. It is very difficult for the refugees to get in the swing of things, and sometimes they panic because they fear they might lose all that they have. Also some refugees have practiced hatred towards authority because they were abused by them in the camps and when a situation like that takes place and the authority comes they are scared that they will be arrested or abused again. All of the Burmese refugees are scared of the police because of their past experiences and somehow they need to realize that the cops here are a little different from the cops who abused them back in the camps.

Airport Pick-Ups (Blog#11)

(Source: http://files.myopera.com/macmoe2001/albums/5314232/P1010147.JPG)

 

       

             The airport has been my second home in the last 3 years of my life. My job as a Case Manager's Assistant includes picking up new arrivals from the airport, taking them to their new home and giving them a brief orientation and so forth. It is pleasant but painful sometimes. It is pleasant to tell them "Welcome to America!" although I know it will be one of the toughest challenges they have faced; it is also painful to see them physically tired. Some of the new arrivals come from Asia, some of them include: Thailand, Malaysia, Bhutan, Nepal, Vietnam, and Laos. Other countries include: Iraq, Somalia, Jordan, and so forth. Because I am a Burmese Interpreter, I only pick up new Burmese arrivals therefore; I get to say "Welcome to America!" in Burmese. It's the greatest feeling of all, to be able to welcome them with a familiar language and a familiar figure. After all they are in a country where most people do not understand their language, traditions and etc. Sometimes I will have to go to Logan International Airport in Boston if the new arrivals have serious medical issues, in such cases we immediately transfer them to Children's Hospital, or Mass General Hospital for further medical treatments. Most of the time the arrivals will come late at night and it is bothersome for me to pick them up but still, if I don't go, who would? No one else in my office speaks Burmese therefore will not be able to make the new comers feel welcomed. I remember once when I was picking up a family, their flight kept delaying; midnight to early morning and so forth. The flight was delayed for 4 hours and I had to wait and eventually fell asleep at the airport waiting for the family to arrive. I was so exhausted that I couldn’t even go to school the next day. The best way to have a friendly relationship with the newcomers is to pick them up from the air port and that way they will remember that I am the first Burmese person they say when they came to Lowell. That is the most rewarding thing of all; recognition…

Burmese Tigers (Blog#10)

(Source: Aung Khine Min)

'Burmese Tigers' is a soccer team that I created last summer to compete regionally with other Burmese teams around the state. I personally recruited Burmese men who reside in Lowell between the ages of 18-25 to play for the team. It was very difficult to get the men involved in the team because they had work, and obligations at home which take precedent. Therefore I had to scrape together what I could with the guys and tried to work out a schedule that was flexible for all. Our goal was to win the state tournament for the four cities that had Burmese communities. The cities are: Boston, Lowell, Lynn, and Worcester. You see, the problem was that we wanted to play Burmese soccer, not the English or the American soccer; therefore we didn't want to participate in other tournaments that were being organized by the state or other organizations. The main reason why we didn't want to participate in state-organized by tournaments is because of health issues. The state and organizations require all players to have health insurance and if a player gets injured, they will probably make a big deal out of it. We didn't want that. But of course, we had proper equipments such as: cleats, socks, and shin guards. When we play soccer, we don't whine, we don't complain because the referee didn't care, it was pure soccer combined with a lot of fighting techniques. The conditions of the field did not allow us to play barefoot which we all preferred because cleats get heavy and they might cause injuries. But in America, I guess we had to conform to the social norms. It was really hard getting the uniform. Because I was the captain of the team, I had to organize fund-raising and budget handling for my team; we didn't have a real manager so I had to fill in. My position was a right half-back. We only had 11 players exactly so we couldn't afford to lose any players; therefore we were very careful in playing other teams. On the 26th of August, the tournament took place in Lowell. The scores and the match-ups are as follows:
1. Lowell 4 Vs Lynn 1
2. Lynn 3 Vs Worcester 2
3. Boston 4 Vs Worcester 1
4. Boston 4 Vs Lynn 3
5. Lowell 3 Vs Boston 2
6. Lowell 5 Vs Worcester 1
We won the year's tournament although they couldn't afford a tournament we were very honored and respected by every city. We will be doing this again this summer and I look forward to organize and participate in the soccer tournament before I go off to college.

Shoes (Blog#9)

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I wore no shoes when I was in Thailand; I walked around barefoot like many others. I never craved for shoes as I was unaware of their existence. I had a rubber flip flop for special occasions such as some traditional celebrations in the camps. I watched some Hollywood movies in those community theaters but I didn't really pay attention to their shoes, and didn't really care. But once I got to Kuala Lumpur, I started to notice what others were wearing and started to look at myself. I wore old rubber flip flops that shows that I am from the country side, I had no sense of 'style', I had no looks, I had no clothes, I had no shoes... People started to mock in me, they looked at me with those discriminating eyes. Whenever I walked around the city, I had to be in constant fear of getting arrested, of getting laughed at. I was not confident, I was very beat-down and depressed.. I never had the money to buy new shoes for me, I never make enough even though I work a lot. My job paid 20 Malaysian ringgit for the whole day and it was barely enough for me get food and other necessities, my desire to buy a new pair of shoes was extinguished by the harsh reality I had. When I came to the U.S, I started working for more money and I had more money in my hands, and I started to buy more and more shoes. I have 27 pairs of shoes and I proud of my collection. I was fulfilling the dreams that I didn't have the chance to fulfill to have excessive amount of shoes. A person told me that the two most important things are a good bed and good pairs of shoes because you live half of your life walking and sleeping... It might seem strange and weird to most of you but still I like it...